Catfishing is a dangerous form of online deception where someone pretends to be a different person than they actually are. The goal is to make the victim fall in love with the catfish.
Once the catfish obtains the victim’s trust, they might ask the victim for money. Catfish are very good at coming up with excuses to ask for “financial aid”, so be warned. Luckily, if you’re dealing with a catfish, there are often some signals that give this away. The list below contains common signs of catfishing.
- Avoiding (video) calls and face-to-face meetings
- No online presence
- Very few friends or followers
- A very recently created profile
- Only using professional pictures
- Stolen pictures
- Asking for money
- Asking for explicit images or videos
Do you want to learn more about catfishing, the signs, how to prevent it, and what to do if you’re a victim? Read the extensive article down below.
With the surge in social media and online dating over the last decade, catfishing has become more common than ever. In 2020 alone, over 23,000 US citizens reported being a victim of catfishing. Moreover, the financial damage caused by catfishing is devastating. The 23,000 victims reported combined damage of more than $605,000,000.
But what is this dangerous practice of catfishing you’ve heard so much about exactly? Where can you get catfished? What are the signs you are being catfished? What should you do to prevent it if you have already become a victim? We will answer all these questions in this extensive article.
What is Catfishing?
Catfishing means pretending to be someone else to deceive someone into wanting a romantic relationship with the pretender. To this end, the catfisher generally uses made-up stories and fake photos to support their fake identity.
Some people catfish just because they feel they’re getting very limited romantic attention. However, catfishers often have much more sinister motives. Many of them ask for money once they have gained the victim’s trust, for example. Alternatively, they might attempt to force people to “pay up,” for instance, by combining catfishing with other scams, such as sextortion, which frequently happens.
Now, you might rightfully ask yourself: why is it called catfishing? Some people think it came from the popular 2010 documentary Catfish, which discusses a young man being deceived by a woman with a fake Facebook profile. However, the documentary simply popularized the term – it didn’t invent it.
The term originally comes from the early 1900s, when anglers used to ship catfish with codfish. Since the catfish is the natural enemy of the cod, it’d chase the fish around constantly, keeping it fresh, active, and better-tasting. Since digital catfishers also chase their victim, the term was adopted to describe them as well.
Why do People Catfish?
There are many different reasons people catfish. Some are more “innocent.” For instance, some people catfish because they feel lonely or underappreciated in a society that doesn’t find them attractive. Their goal often is merely to create an online persona to attract people they feel wouldn’t be interested in them in real life.
Things get more severe when the end goal of catfishing is to harass or stalk victims. In some cases, catfishing can even lead to or be a part of even more severe forms of abuse.
Then there is the common financial incentive: many catfishers end up scamming their victims for money. They will often come up with excuses to ask for financial help. They might tell the victim they need money to go and see them. Or maybe a family member is ill, and they need some money to cover medical costs. You may feel you’re helping them out by transferring (some) money, but they will likely keep coming up with more excuses to ask for financial aid.
Where Can I Get Catfished?
Catfishing mainly takes place on social media platforms and online dating sites or apps. Below, we discuss some of the most common “catfishing platforms” and what this scam looks like on these platforms.
Tinder catfishing
Tinder is one of the biggest online dating platforms and by far the biggest one in the US. Therefore, it won’t come as a surprise that the “Tinder Catfish” is one of the most common species of catfish. It’s best to learn how to manage your privacy on Tinder to prevent opportunistic catfishers.
Once the catfish has “matched with their victim,” they will message them and try to gain their trust. This is when the catfishing cycle begins. Fortunately, Tinder has recently announced they will soon require ID verification for all users. This should make it much more difficult for catfishers to find their “catch.”
Catfishing on Facebook
With about 86 million fake Facebook accounts and Facebook being the largest social medium in the world, it’s hardly surprising that there is so much catfishing on Facebook.
Many of us have likely received a suspicious-looking friend request at one point or another. It’s best to ignore and delete these. After all, according to the Better Business Bureau, 85% of catfishing scams start on Facebook. The launch of Facebook Dating (in 2019) is likely to have increased this percentage.
Facebook catfishing generally starts with sending a friend request to the victim. Sometimes the catfisher sends a direct message, hoping the victim will answer. Once the victim responds, the perpetrator will reel them in with sweet-talking and fake stories. There are quite a few other Facebook scams out there, so it’s best to remain up to date and arm yourself.
Instagram catfishing
With a platform as visually orientated as Instagram and more than a billion users, Instagram catfishing can hardly be avoided completely. Catfishers can send their victim either a follow request or a direct message using Instagram Direct. The latter will appear as a message request and has to be approved by the victim.
Instagram is no stranger to profiles that (seemingly) belong to the rich, successful, and beautiful. Therefore, anyone can come into contact with someone that seems to be a little bit too good to be true and will eventually turn out to be a catfish. This is just one of many Instagram scams you should know about.
8 Signs You Are Being Catfished
Catfishers are generally excellent at tricking their victims. They rely on the emotions of affection and infatuation to cloud their victim’s judgment. Nevertheless, there are usually a few clear warning signs you are being catfished. We will go over these red flags below and elaborate on each of the signs.
1. Avoiding (video) calls
Catfishers want to avoid situations where their true identity is exposed. Therefore, they’ll never agree to a video chat or to meet up in person. Often, they won’t even accept a regular call (without video). After all, even their voice could expose information they don’t want you to know, such as them being a man instead of a woman or vice versa. Therefore, if someone you met online has constant excuses not to meet up or have a (video) call, this should be a definite red flag for catfishing.
2. No online presence (on other platforms)
A large part of our presence is online these days. Therefore, you can expect someone active on one social platform to also be active on others. This is even truer when we focus on a younger demographic, where catfishing is rampant.
Ask yourself: Why does that successful businessman you just met on Facebook not have a LinkedIn page to promote his company, or even to look for new partnerships and recruits? Why does that beautiful fitness model chatting you up on Tinder not have examples of her work on Instagram or her Facebook page?
If the person you just met has a very lacking online presence, ask yourself why. Especially when combined with other signs, this might just be a red flag.
3. Very few friends or followers
When someone approaching you online has very few friends on Facebook or followers on Instagram, this could be a red flag for catfishing. Most people use social media to connect and keep in touch with people online. Supposedly, part of this process is having a decent online circle to communicate or keep in touch with.
Of course, this doesn’t always mean you’re dealing with a catfisher. If a profile doesn’t have this social circle, this could be because they’re new on the platform or simply prefer not to have too many contacts. It could also be a sign that keeping in touch with family, friends, colleagues, and acquaintances is not the primary goal of their social media use. Even so, be very cautious when a profile has very few friends or followers.
4. A very recently created profile
If a social media profile was very recently created, this could be a red flag. This is especially something to look out for if a profile does have a decent number of friends or followers, but something still seems “fishy.”
A recently created profile could just mean someone is genuinely new to a social medium. But it could also mean they frequently create fake profiles to find new victims to catfish. After all, once a profile is flagged or reported on a social medium, it’s often removed. As such, catfish often create many fake profiles, either one after another or simultaneously.
5. “Professional” pictures
Another huge giveaway that something’s off is if your romantic interest only has professional-looking pictures on their profile. Most people on social media — celebrities and influencers excluded — mainly upload pictures taken by family and friends and some selfies.
If you encounter a profile full of professional-looking pictures, this might be either a sign they’re using someone else’s photos (more on this later), or they went through great effort to make themselves look better than they really are. In both instances, it’s wise to ask yourself why.
Even if they are their real photos, it’s probable someone’s trying to lure you in with excessively flattering pictures. Of course, plenty of (aspiring) models promote themselves on social media, but how many of those approach random strangers online out of romantic interest?
6. Stolen pictures
Needless to say, the use of stolen pictures online is an even more serious sign of malicious intent than using stock, professional photos. If someone is using stolen pictures, it’s very likely they are out to scam you. After all, scamming people on social media is one of the most common reasons for creating fake accounts.
Fortunately, it’s often quite easy to find out whether someone is using stolen pictures on social media. You can simply use Google reverse image search to find similar pictures like the one used by your (potential) catfisher and find out where they come from. To do this, simply go to Google Images and click on the little camera icon to upload a picture or paste a picture’s URL and start your search.
7. Asking for money
This is one of the most obvious signs you’re dealing with a catfish. After all, a common reason for catfishing people is to come up with excuses to ask them for money down the line. Ask yourself: How likely is it that you would ask someone you just met online for money, especially if you’re hoping to have a relationship with them?
8. Asking for explicit pictures or videos
Asking for explicit pictures or videos can be a huge red flag. This could mean the asker is trying to combine catfishing with another dangerous form of cybercrime: sextortion. In this scenario, catfishing is actually used to obtain sensitive images of you, which will later be used as leverage to extort you into providing more images or paying the “sextorter.”
Bonus tip: Social catfish
There’s a comprehensive online tool that can help you find out whether you’re being catfished: Social Catfish. This tool allows you to investigate people by filling out their name and country, email address, phone number, social media username, address, or by uploading their image. Alternatively, you can do a more extensive search by filling out more details about the person.
The one downside with their service, however, is that some might consider it quite pricey. It’s around $6 for a five-day trial and about $27 for a monthly subscription. Then there is also the possibility of hiring a “Search Specialist” for a comparatively hefty fee of $297.
Despite the priciness, it’s good to know that such services exist for people who need them. Moreover, Social Catfish’s search results are generally very extensive. You get multiple profiles to choose from after doing a search. Perhaps most importantly, the information you get while clicking on a profile is very comprehensive: everything from their address history and social media profiles to past relationships and criminal records you’ll be able to find.
What (Not) to Do When You’ve Been Catfished
We obviously hope that by studying and recognizing the above catfishing signals, you will stay safe online. However, anyone can get unlucky or have a momentary lapse of judgment. Therefore, we offer you some steps to go through if you’re a catfishing victim below. These steps will not undo your experience, but hopefully they will mitigate some of the damage and help others stay safe(r) online.
- Don’t give the catfish any money. If you gave them money in the past, stop doing so.
- If you have given them money, call or contact your local police department so they can start an investigation. In some cases, people got their money back this way. After all, obtaining money from victims this way is a form of cyber fraud. Use this link to find out how to report cybercrime if you live in Europe (the UK included). If you live in the US you should file a complaint with the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center.
- Block the catfish from your social media accounts and stop contacting them.
- Report the catfish on the website or platform where you met them.
- If the catfish scammed you, it can’t hurt to help others stay safe by reporting it to a scam tracker, such as the one operated by the Better Business Bureau.
For more cyber safety tips, read our guide to avoiding online scams.
Do you have a specific question about catfishing you want answered straight away? Check out our frequently asked questions about this topic down below. Simply click on a question to see the answer. Is your question not there? Leave a comment and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible!
Catfishing is an online malpractice that involves deceiving a victim by pretending to be someone else than you actually are. The catfish will make the victim fall in love with them, with fake pictures and stories about how great they and their lives are. Once the catfish has the victim’s trust, different things can happen. Often, the perpetrator will ask the victim for money, using a crafty fake story. To learn more about catfishing, read this article.
There are many possible warning signs for catfishing. Three very common signs of catfishing are the following ones:
- Avoiding video calls and face-to-face meetings
- Using stolen pictures
- Asking for money
There are many other signs as well. Read this article to find out what they are.
Catfishing is an increasingly common phenomenon: in 2020 alone 23,000 US citizens reported being a victim of catfishing. Needless to say, it’s likely many cases go unreported.
The damages resulting from catfishing are also enormous: about $605,000,000 in 2020. Again, the actual amount (unreported cases included) is likely much higher.
The signals of Instagram catfishing are quite similar to other types of catfishing. Needless to say, Instagram is a very visually orientated profile. As such, expect to see a lot of glamorous pictures on a catfisher’s profile. We recommend verifying if these are real by doing a quick Google reverse image search. For more information on catfishing, we recommend reading our extensive article.
Having been asked for money many times on Instagram, I can usually tell when its going to happen. (1) An attractive woman will start to folow and/or message me; (2) She'll call me "baby", "darling", and similar words right off the bat; (3) She'll rarely provide personal information, such as where she lives, what she does for a living, etc. and the information on her webpage may appear suspect; (4) She won't talk much about what interests her and she doesn't really care what interests me; (5) Her grammar and/or spelling is often bad. Usually the request for money occurs when you've conversed online for a couple of weeks, although it could be sooner. If you don't send money, you'll never hear from her again.
Hi Jim! This is indeed a very common scam. Thank you for sharing your experience and tips. The best thing to do when receiving a follow request from an account you do not know is be wary right away! And never send someone you don't know money. Better be safe than sorry!
I received a friend request in FB just a few weeks ago. Since we had a mutual friend I accepted. We just chatted the first week.
I mentioned this to my niece and she put his photo into Google image search. Within seconds 6 additional FB pages came up. He used an American name on the one he contacted me with but the other 5 used a foreign name. I think he is from Dubai.
I confronted him and he swore these had been cloned or were fan sites. Many of the same pictures of him appeared on each site.
A few days later he asked me to download Venmo, Zelle, PayPal and Cashapp and wanted me to send him screenshots of each. Bingo…the catfish attempt finally came to the surface. He said he had funds coming in and needed my help since he traveled so much. I asked him how he handled payments in the past since he always traveled lots. Basically, I told him I could not get involved, especially when he said the funds would come in as Cryptocurrency.
I have not heard from him since. I always expected the catfish so I let it play out so I could turn him down.
My concern is the other women he may have or will scam.
Thanks
Thank you for sharing your experience, Judy! You definitely saw through this catfisher quickly and effectively. We hope your story will sound familiar to others, so they can avoid falling for the same kind of schemes! On top of that: don't hesitate to report these kinds of profiles to Facebook, and you might want to check up with your mutual friend as well, to make sure they're aware of the dangers.
About a month ago I was contacted by email from a young man in Russia. He said he was upset that I didn't respond back. This was the first email I saw. I emailed him back with some chitchat and asked how he found me or my email address. He wrote back but didn't mention how he found me. He says he translates my English to Russian, and has his Russian emails translated to English for me. We've been emailing every day for over a month. We send casual photos every day. Never explicit photos. He's 25 and I'm 63 living in Florida. A romance has developed. He tells me how much he loves me and wants to be with me as his partner. I feel the same way. He's very romantic and tells me about his work and life in Russia. I have completely fallen for him. He's never asked for money. Now he wants to leave the life he has in Russia and come to Florida and live with me. He wants to share his life with me as his partner. I'm on SSD with a monthly check. He says he will love me forever and cook and play his guitar every day for me. I could do without the guitar. I would love to be with him and spend the rest of my life with him. I told a friend about this and was told I was being catfished. Didn't know what that was. Now I'm confused. Is this real love or am I just an old fool that's being cat fished. I don't even know his last name. I've asked but he's never answered that question. I would think it would be difficult now for someone to fly out of Moscow to America. Thanks.
Dear Garland,
We're sorry you're in this situation. Unfortunately, it does sound very typical of a catfisher. The fact that this man won't answer your questions and promises you all of those things as long as he can live with you (likely having you pay for the entire thing) is a big red flag. I would definitely trust your friend in this and be very, very wary of your future contact with this man. If he asks you to pay for anything, don't!
I also want to add that catfishers are clever and use very nasty tactics to get under your skin. It isn't on you that you were "tricked." It's actually a great sign that you ended up on this page and did research! These people are just very nifty and will say anything to string you along and make you believe them. All you can do is exactly what you're doing now: get educated and be suspicious of the contact itself. We recommend blocking and reporting this contact the moment he starts asking for money.
Wishing you all the best!
The guy that I am very interested in. I know is being catfish by a woman for the past year and a half.. he says that he loves her, but she has never once made an attempt to see him. There’s always an excuse to why she will not visit him, and he not be able to visit her. There’s always always an excuse. How can I help him? I have tried many things, and nothing seems to work, I do not know what she is saying to him, but whatever it is, she has him hook line and sinker. Please help.
Hi Barbara. If you fear someone you know is being catfished, the best thing you can do is to gently breach the topic with them and educate them about the topic. We realise this can be tricky, however. Whether this is an actual case of catfishing or not, it is always good to be aware of the dangers.
I think my sister is being catfished how can I go about taking to her about this I heard him ask her for a card and tell her he loves her and how sweet she is and he wants to come and see her?
That sounds very tricky indeed. It might be best to breach the topic gently, inform her about the existence of catfishers and tell her you want this to go well, but that you're worried she will get hurt and lose a lot of money. If someone she's never seen before claims to love her but needs money to see her, that is very likely a catfisher.
I was scammed over a year ago by someone on Facebook who made me fall for him and didn’t realize anything about it until afterwards. I’m ashamed to admit I fell for this person and his lies because I was ignorant of such things even tho I am an elderly person. I hate to admit I sent him a lot of money vi gift cards. At one time one of the sales person in Walmart asked if I was being scammed but I was really snowed under. I was truly naive and stupid for an old woman. I will never be so foolish in the future but I wish I had recovered my money
We're really sorry to hear that happened, Frances! Catfishers can be incredibly cunning. Thank you for sharing your story. It might just help inform someone else in a similar situation before it's too late.
Facebook is not doing anything to protect us users against these people. We have to bust a move here just to switch off the messeging requests, hide our martial status from the, and our friends lists from these catfishes to hide ourselves. Instagram has catfishes too, and when they want to follow you, you end up following them and they set their profiles as private and then then you have to wait until they approve you just to see their professional shots. Same as Google Chat, there are catfishere there, and with gmail they can be untracable. We got to do something about this, ignoring them, blocking them, and they blocking us, it just gives them lead way for them to make a new gmail, Facebook and Instagram account to go attack some more victims. These catfishes are fake bots, aliens from another world, or from another time frame. It's going to get worse over time we don't do nothing about it. We need tools and better detection in Anti Virus software to detect these fake profiles.
One more sign that you are being catfished: You’ve been having a several days or weeks of nice conversations, then you make he or she know that you are suspicious, they’ll get offended and threaten to stop talking to you. That will put you on the defensive and make you apologize and quit pursuing your doubts. Best think to do at this point? Say “ok, bye”
Hi Edgar! You're very right. Catfishing definitely includes manipulative behavior like this. A catfish will try to earn your trust and love, then use that against you.
I think I been catfished by the girl I talked to on Bumble BFF. She was avoiding meeting face to face. We was supposed to met at Trudy’s in Austin, Texas. She ignored me when I asked for the location of the Trudy’s. So I deleted the app. I don’t appreciate people doing that to me. I deleted the app. I’m not looking for friends on the internet. I’ll go get Tex-Mex by myself.
Let me tell you they will say anything to get what they want and will make up any story to get it. So be careful and demand a real time video chat. DO NOT GIVE ANY MONEY UNDER ANY CONDITION.
if you know someone is a scammer how can you let people know? other countries have where scammer is written on their face book why doesnt US have thie
Hi Catherine! The best thing to do when you know someone's a scammer is to report them to the platform they're on (for example Facebook or Instagram). Beyond that, you can report possible scams on various scam tracker platforms, like the Better Business Bureau. This can help other people spot scammers more easily.
I was talking to someone from Ghana. I did get scammed.
Meet them on Plenty of Fish.
Thought it was too good to be true.
First it was a "I need so much for a plane ticket" then it was because they would not let her on the plane because she didn't have travel money.
So how to I report this?
That's a very common scam indeed. If you've given the scammer money, it's best to contact the local police and see what your options are for reporting the crime. Aside from that, you can use Plenty Of Fish to block and report the account (click on the three dots, then choose "Report User") to help protect others against the account. Finally, you can also report to a scam tracker, like that by the Better Business Bureau. This way, you can spread the word and help others recognize scammers more quickly. Good luck!
I've been talking to this one guy for over 2 years now. I met him on Facebook. He said he was a pilot in Amsterdam Netherlands. I've asked him to send a recent photo, says his phone doesn't work that good. And asked him to video chat and he said his phone is messed up. Now he finished his job a year ago but he says he's coming to meet me and he's getting the money to come. But he's asked me to help out with money and a new phone. He sent me a video but his voice is different on the phone. My family says he's a Scammer yet I don't believe it somewhat. He tells me loves me and can't live without me. I have deep feelings for him. I fell in love with him so quick. And I haven't even met him. He's got an accent also. I want to believe he's not one.
Hi Lisa! It does indeed sound like this could be a catfisher. Our advice would be to NOT send him money under any circumstances. That's the telltale sign that something is off. It's a good thing you're doubtful about that video, too. It sounds like he's trying to win your trust by giving you kind of what you asked for (a video) but not what you need to actually verify his identity (an actual video chat where you can talk to him directly). Definitely be careful!
Do they usually involve other members of your family? I mean texting with others in your family. How elaborate are these catfishers?
It differs, but catfishing schemes can be incredibly elaborate. Via your socials (Facebook etc.) they could possibly get in touch with your family, trying to scam them, too, all to make their act seem more genuine and real.